[bell tolls]
[brassy detective music]
- Hit it. - ♪ Hey-oh, yah, hah ♪
- ♪ Oh, hey-oh ♪ - Yeah.
- ♪ Hey-oh ♪ - Yeah.
♪ Oh-hey-oh ♪
[camera shutter clicks]
Cute and cuddly, boys.
[suspenseful music]
[overlapping conversation]
All right, let's get this over with.
Where's the ringtail with tonight's
moronic "Royal Decree?"
Ah, ah, no-ity no-no!
Do not be pointing the blamey penguin flippers
in this vicinity. I have decreed nothing!
It's true. We thought this was another penguin meeting.
Shyeah. Probably about something stupid
there and useless.
Like safety.
I'm bored.
- Here... - [fuse hissing]
Go run around the pool with this.
Oh, I'm a wizard.
- Wait... - [loud explosion]
Ow! My magic!
Wait, if none of us called this meeting...
Oh, good! You're all here.
Come on, get friendly.
We're all buddies, right?
Quick! Where's the emergency?
- Um. - No time for words.
Just point to where we bring the violence.
Whoa, I don't--
4:00! Advance!
- [buzzing] - Ah ha!
Hey! There is no emergency.
Filing a false reports is a serious offense, Marlene.
Eh, is there a point to this not-emergency meeting,
or can I get back to my regularly scheduled
not being around all of you?
Actually, being around each other kinda is the point.
Ooh, twisty. I'm intrigued.
We never do stuff together as a zoo anymore.
We're all off in our own habitats.
I mean, when was the last time you heard Ted, the polar bear,
even say anything?
Wow, that is so true.
This place needs some serious zoo-bonding time.
And I have got just the thing.
Game night!
- [overlapping conversation] - Whoa-ho-ho-ho, sister.
Game night is a fickle and treacherous beast.
And I don't think you can handle it.
Uh huh. I can't handle... board games?
But we do game night, Skipper.
We've never had a problem, have we?
That's just what Manfredi and Johnson asked me.
Six hours before they washed up inside a thimble
on Ventnor Avenue.
- ALL: [gasp] - Thimbles...
It'll turn on you, Marlene.
Faster than macaroni salad in a hot Norwegian sauna.
Mark my words!
Are you marking them? Who's marking my words?
I dunno.
- Well grab a pencil. - I brought snacks.
[overlapping conversation]
Go fish, sucker!
Boom!
You know...
a simple yes or no would suffice.
Awesome! Boom!
[jangling noise]
All right, house rules.
No standing on toosies, cash out at ninesies,
double bonus for poison hand style.
Are you sure we're supposed to be betting on jacks?
Uh, it's more of a secret thing
that only big boys do.
- I'm a big boy, I am! - I too am big!
♪ Hey-oh ♪
♪ Oh, hey-oh ♪
Ah!
- ALL: Whoa! - Oh, no, no, no!
- [loud smash] - Yes!
- [groans] - I win again!
Hey, hey! Way to call
that blind man's bluff, Roger.
Ooh, careful, Ted, that one's a hot potato.
[laughs]
Spin that bottle like you own it, Barry!
Yeah!
Ch-ch-ch-ch-chimps, wuzzup?
[sighs] We were hoping to sample
the sweet and salty party mix.
What? But that was a full night's supply.
- What happened? - [chewing noises]
Sweet... sweet...
and the salty is...
right there!
[laughs] Yes, it's like a delicious
tugging-of-war in my mouth.
[sighs]
Well, that's somewhat disappointing.
Aha! It's off the rails, Marlene.
- Um... - The crowd is turning.
Rico! Riot gear!
[hoching]
Now start clubbing, and don't stop
until everyone learns good citizenship.
- BOTH: Ah! - Hey, easy club sandwich!
Look, somebody just needs to go on a snack run.
I mean, I feel bad tearing anyone away from the fun, but...
Maurice, Mort.
You don't like fun, right?
Say what?
Snacky run!
Bring me 53% sweet, meleventy-twelve percent salty.
You know how I like it.
Clock is ticking, mammals.
Your target is the 2nd Avenue Snackatarium.
Well, wait! You're not coming?
No, I need to watch over this bubbling cauldron
of apocalyptic rage.
Tag! You're it!
But maybe one of the boys will.
[hoarsely] I volunteer.
What about alarms?
They make very loud ringing noises.
Any other questions?
What about silent alarms?
[scoffs]
To the trained ear attuned to the slightest vibration,
there is no such thing as a silent alarm.
[gleeful shouts]
Scanning for game night crisis.
Scanning...
still scanning.
Hey, it's okay to be wrong.
I mean, come on. I just want to hear it one time.
"Game night is really awesome,
and Marlene has really brought the zoo together.
- Scanning... - Lousy stinking card cheats!
- Eh? - And so it begins.
What's the trouble, longtrunks? Crisis?
I don't know how they're cheating, but they're cheating.
[buzzing noise]
How did he know that?
You, you and you. Banned from cards.
Okay, problem solved. Fun restored.
[indistinct chatter]
Containment mode, go!
[growling, snarling]
Whoa, spikenose.
Would you please tell these yahoos
I am not a ring toss game.
Ha!
It's not just for show, buddy boy.
52 dollars and eight cents.
Let's see, currency exchange rates make that
four cans of sardines.
Uh, where'd you get the sardines?
- Petty cash. - That is not what
my petty cash looks like.
Now remember, lift with the legs and
- we'll be back to the fun in-- - [sirens]
Come out slowly with your hands where I can see them.
Oh, no!
[groans]
All right, I'll let him go.
But no more duck-duck-goose "special kissing rules."
Okay, okay. We can plays
smooching charades instead.
- [groaning] - [bones cracking]
Makeout mahjong? [groaning]
- Pucker up pinochle. - Ew!
Donkey.
Donkey...
Circle.
Ball.
Circle.
It's the sun. Look at the lines.
Lines mean it's the sun.
Like a ray. You understand this?
Oiy, cut that out, you drongo!
- Easy, boys! - Back it off, back it off.
Call of the games, Marlene.
This ain't zoo bonding, it's zoo beating.
See what I did there? I, uh... i turned it--
[crash]
Okay. Okay, yeah, things got
a teeny bit heated there,
but everything's back under control.
Donkey... donkey...
Yeow!
[buzzing noise]
No shoving!
- Really? - [elephant roars]
I say!
[crash]
[embarrassed laugh]
Maybe if we're really quiet and ignore him,
he'll just go away.
[sirens]
I think it's working.
He's got a partner at the back exit.
We're completely boxed in.
I thought you penguins always had an escape plan.
Oh, yes, but they all involve vomiting explosives.
I can't do that!
[gasps]
Eureka! We'll float out!
I recommend 14 balloons a piece,
secured with a taut line hitch for maximum--
Stand down! We're coming inside!
[balloons popping]
Get more back up! More back up!
I want two on the door, get me a perimeter,
and where's my swat van?
- [tires skidding] - Oh, boys!
Game night stinks!
- Y'all are crazy. - Rots to the core.
I hate everybody!
No, no, no, no, no! Togetherness. Bond, bonding.
We're having... we are having fun!
Too late, Marlene. It's the games.
Their tiny cardboard souls are laminated with villainy.
Curse you, Parcheesi!
Yo, careful around our TV.
Hey! That's our TV!
Not, no more.
We won it from the little guy in a, uh...
Legitimate game of chance.
I thought I could handle fivesies.
It was just so many jacks.
No dice, primates.
This telly ain't just Private's, so...
[both grunting]
- Give it! - C'mon.
- Leggo. - Drop it!
This is Chuck Charles reporting live
from the scene of the 2nd Avenue's
Snackatarium standoff.
- Snacka-- - Tarium...
Action news has identified the thieves as a pair of small
furry children, and their genetically-altered super duck.
Hey, yo! Lemurs on the TV over here.
Who cares?
And some kinda genetically altered superducky.
- That's terrible! - Somebody should help them.
What are we gonna do, Skipper?
- I need options. - Ah...
- From Marlene. - Huh?
- [beeping] - And that's the assault vehicle
backing in.
My noble career ends on a party snack run.
Could there be any greater humiliation?
Candy moustache!
I'll be weeping over there.
[beeping]
[suspenseful music]
All right, we're talking a distraction/extraction combo.
I hope you know your stuff, Marlene.
Let the games begin.
Release the tiddlywinks!
[clank]
[clanking]
Fore!
[swooshing]
ALL: Red rover, red rover, send baca right over.
Whoa!
Hey, I just gotta say you guys is the real heroes.
[painful cry]
Black and white knight to game master,
I've still got two on the roof.
Julien and Roy, your turn to play.
Duck... duck...
dodge-coconut!
Move in!
What is goin' on out--
- Hello. - Come on.
We can't distract them forever.
Mmm, sweet...
wait for it. Wait for it.
Salty!
- Ha-ha! - [door smashing]
Thank you, everybody!
- Best game night ever! - That was awesome!
- [funky beat] - [humming]
Uh, uh, uh, uh, uh...
- Let's hear it for zoo bonding. - [hand claps]
[dramatic music]
Oh, there's nothing like a good jog through the park,
right, Maurice?
[gasping] Like, you would know.
- Ugh. - Oof!
Yea!
I winned the race. [laughs]
First off, Mort, it wasn't a race.
When we exercise, we all win.
Second off, I am the king, so...
♪ In your face uh-uh ♪
♪ I won the race, uh-uh ♪
♪ You, sir, are a loser, ha! ♪
Ah.
This health kick is kicking my butt.
Can we call it a day?
- What? No pilates? - No!
And you're walking back to the zoo on your own two feet.
But we just got here.
There's so much seeing to be sighting.
Kitty cats!
Dirty, lousy kitty cats!
- Who what? - Kitty cats, kitty cats,
I hate kitty cats!
That dumb doggy thinks we are lowly felines.
[crash]
This may not be the best time to argue the point.
Oops. I missed the kitty cats.
- Run! - Kitty cats!
Gonna get you, kitty cats.
He's gaining on us!
Mort, save your king!
Waa!
[dog barks and whines]
Poor Mort. How could you?
Don't worry. I have a plan to fix this.
ANNOUNCER: Smiles are like daisies.
Plant one and dozens spring up.
Oh Lunacorns, you are so wise and so right.
Hello.
We are needing a new cute guy.
And this one will do in a pinching.
Ringtail, you lost me at "hello."
That was your big plan?
Look, a big dog in the park got Mort.
Big dog. Really big!
Sad eyes in canine danger?
Saddle up, boys.
Wait, wait, wait!
We don't need any saddling.
I already have a better plan.
"New cute guy?" Hmmm?
Private, the first hours in any search and rescue are vital.
I can't lose another minute to ringtail's shenanigans.
You can count on me, Skipper.
Here's your new cute guy.
[squealing]
[growling] ALL: Ah!
[laughs]
What the deuce?
BOTH: [laughs]
Sad eyes, you're playing with this beast?
Oh, hi, penguins.
This is my new bestest friend, Elmer.
He plays, and makes lots and lots of slobber.
Oh, thanks, li'l squeaky.
You're the bestest friend I ever had.
Even better than that old sock with the hole in it
I found that one time.
I thought little squeaky was a dirty stinking kitty cat.
But he's not at all.
He's a... [thud]
- Squeak! - Li'l squeaky!
Okay. Glad you two are having fun.
But this is a search and rescue.
The search is over, now it's time for the rescue.
BOTH: Oh!
Bye-bye, Elmer.
I'm gonna miss you li'l squeaky.
This needn't be goodbye forever.
BOTH: Really?
Certainly, you could schedule what humans call a "playdate."
Playdate?
A time when children play
together so their high-strung mothers
can actually talk like grown-ups
for more than two stinking minutes.
They're very high-strung.
I like playdates.
Playdate tomorrow?
Okay! Okay!
Playdate tomorrow, playdate tomorrow, playdate tomorrow.
Better idea.
Playdate today!
Wee-he-he-he!
We got a runner!
ALL: Whoa!
[thud]
Okay, new cute guy, here's how we are doing things.
Maurice makes the smoothies
while you try to cuddle the royal feets
and subsequently fail when I kick you.
Gosh... Maurice always makes the smoothies?
Yep, that's my job.
Every single day.
Well, the Lunacorns say "You'll enjoy life more
if you share a chore."
I'll make the smoothies.
Hey, whoa, whoa, wait, wait.
Then who is trying to cuddle the royal feets?
Maurice? He's not even cute.
He's got a point. Cute ain't my thing.
Oh, well, um, you're kinda cute, king Julien.
Cute?
I'm freakishly adorable.
I mean have you seen this fluffity tail?
Right, so maybe you should cuddle Maurice's feet.
Okay, I will.
And I should do the best--wait. What?
I like the new guy.
He's a real idea man.
The readings from the hound hunter indicate that--
[sizzle] There are possible design flaws.
[cat meows]
It's mine. I'm not sharing.
Mine, you hear. Oh, it's you guys.
Hey, what's up?
Moon cat.
Again, I'm not really from the moon.
I wish you would call me Max.
Moon cat, it's a happy accident of fate
that we crossed paths.
- It is? - Indeed.
We need intel on a fellow stray.
A large canine named Elmer.
We'll pay you for your trouble.
[hochs]
Well, you guys did save my life--thanks god--
and what kind of cat would I be
if I passed up the chance to stick it
to some mangy flea taxi?
Now, if you want to find a dog,
you gotta think like a dog.
You gotta be a dog.
Profiling the perp. Classic!
- Everybody, down on all fours. - Good golly.
Remind me to swing back here
to look for my lost dignity.
Somewhere near a fire hydrant,
in an alley, behind a restaurant,
preferably Chinese.
Dogs love sweet and sour pork.
[gasps]
Wong's Fragrant Garden on 28th.
You'll find your pooch there.
Top notch work, moon cat.
- [sniffing] - Down boy!
[whistling]
[shocked] Huh?
[anguished cry]
Maurice, you left my favorite fanning frond on the ground,
and now it's all broken because of your stupid head and--
Whoa, whoa, King Julien.
Like Princess Selfrespectra says,
"Please be alert, your words can hurt."
Okay, yes, but this dummyhead--
Uh-uh, using your kind words, tell me the problem.
[sighs]
Maurice left my favorite fanning frond on the ground.
And?
- Now it is broken! - Because?
I stepped on it!
So you broke it.
Um, well, yes. Er, technically.
So what to you have to say to Maurice?
Eh... I'm sorry?
What just happened?
Apology accepted.
There, all better.
Come on, jump, li'l squeaky!
[laughs] I'm tired.
I don't feel like playing the chewy-pokey teeth game anymore.
You wanna meet the sock with the hole in it?
There's are target.
We clearly came to the right cat.
I have my moments.
All right, we're going to need 50 pounds of c4,
a Sherman tank and a giant bendy straw.
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
You're just going to attack again?
- Yup. - Go with what you know, right?
No, guys, no.
Brute force will just make him run.
You got to lure him away from your little lemur pal.
All fours!
Think dog. What would a dog want?
- A bone? - Too obvious.
- Old beat-up shoes? - Too nasty.
- [hocks] - Eh?
That won't work, either. Yum.
Though I'll hold onto this. Purely for research purposes.
[swallows]
Now come on, guys.
We're thinking like dogs here.
What makes a mutt lose its mind?
Go so crazy nuts, that it can't think
of anything else but one thing.
What're you guys looking at?
Meow!
- It's not working. - Sell it, soldier.
Meow! I'm a cat!
- [growls] - That's me!
A cream lapping, yarn playing, mouse hating C-A-T cat!
Hey, are you a cat?
[licking sound]
- Kitty cat! - Argh!
Kitty, kitty, kitty cat!
[dog barking]
Come on, sad eyes.
Bye, socky. It was very nice meeting you.
Don't be a stranger.
Squeak!
Li'l squeaky!
[growls]
[gasps]
- [door crashes] - [growls]
Run, Max! Run!
Don't think about the fish they gave you.
Don't think about how they saved your life.
Don't think about how they're your only friends.
Oh, you had to go and think that.
[growls]
[crunch] Hey!
Oh, was that your tail?
[growls]
[hoarse whine]
[cat screaming]
[dog barking]
That is one brave moon cat.
It's true what the Lunacorns say.
"Work's like fun when done by more than one."
Oh, if that didn't rhyme, I would dismiss it as idiotic.
You missed a spot.
I do not like this new cute guy and its radical ideas.
I want my Mort back!
King Julien!
Mort?
I'm home!
[dramatic music]
Thanks for taking one for the waddle, young Private.
My pleasure, Skipper.
You know what the Lunacorns say.
No, I don't, Private.
And I intend to keep it that way.
Moon cat, you will not be forgotten.
21-fish salute!
[hocking]
[growls]
Oh! The horror.
Guys, are all these fish from you?
- Wow! - Max, you're not devoured.
Nah... while Elmer was chewing on me,
we got to talking.
It turns out we got a lot in common.
We're both strays.
We could both use a friend.
So Elmer doesn't mind the fact you're a...
Lemur.
[laughs] Which I am.
I thought he was a kitty cat. Dumb Elmer, boo.
Max says he's a lemur, and he should know, right?
Since he's a lemur, he'd be an expert on lemur... things.
That's good dog logic, Elmer.
Don't blow this! [meows]
Max is my new bestest friend.
He's from a place called Madagascar.
That's right, big guy! Mad-a-gas-car.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
[sniffing]