When Holi comes around, you can literally smell it in the air.
The Bhang, the jolliness, the freedom, the Gulaal
and boom!
There go your inhibitions.
Good thing or a bad thing?
Whatever it is
don't take it personally, it's Holi!
Ms. Umang, investment in gyms and fitness studios
is usually a sunk cost.
-Right. -You see,
rent, electricity bill, salaries…
-equipment, equipment maintenance-- -I know there are many overheads, but…
I also know that I can make it work.
And I'm sure I'll break even in three years.
-I have experience… -But as a personal trainer.
Not as an entrepreneur.
Thank you.
Sorry, Ms. Singh, but you have no collateral.
No collateral it seems…
You should start a franchise with a well-known superstar.
That's what everyone is doing these days.
I mean, Ms. Samara must be friends with superstars, right?
Hrithik?
Tiger?
Salman?
Absolutely. I might just go to Bandra to talk to Salman about it.
You know Salman?!
ANJANA - IT'S HOLI! TOMORROW 11 A.M. AT MY PLACE
Let them say what they want Like I care
I will do whatever I want
A little attraction And then some action
Hello mister, how do you do
Mr. Bartender please
Shake it baby, shake a drink for me
Gimme four more shots For me and my ladies
Let go of formalities
Gimme four more shots please
There's no time to waste now
Gimme four more shots please
Radha!
Could you iron these clothes, please?
Arya, baby, please get ready quickly.
No!
Arya!
Molu.
That's enough now. Please, no more tantrums.
No!
Molu please, we're getting late.
Put your dress on quickly. Guests will be arriving soon.
No!
If you don't wear your dress now, then no more Holi party for you, okay?
No water balloons, no water guns, no Gulaal and no dessert!
-No! -Arya!
Arya!
Arya, stop!
I want to go to Dada's place!
I want to play Holi with Aarav!
Arya, but we're having a Holi party here! With mama and your aunties!
-Please come out! -No aunties!
Only Aarav!
Arya! Arya, you need to stop.
You need to stop this!
-Arya, stop right now! -No.
We are not going there and that's final, okay?
White?
Filmy, are we?
It's the dress code.
Well…
I love it.
And I can't wait for you to get wet and wild!
I don't know about wet,
but I am wild.
Rather feral.
You know what the trolls call me, right?
The wild cat that loves to bite!
-Meow! -Meow!
Make that a wild feral sexy cat!
I'm addicted to your touch I…
Need it all the time
The things I want to do to you I can't
Keep them inside
It's getting late.
Anj will be waiting.
I'm waiting too.
To be continued.
I promise.
Love, only love…
It's full of colors…
Hi, Sneha.
Amu.
It's so good to see you, Sneha.
I must say,
you look great!
Almost glowing!
Hi!
Sneha!
Hi.
How are you holding up, darling?
I'm okay.
Looking at you, one wouldn't know it's just been six months.
I mean, I wouldn't be up and about so quickly.
But then again,
when were you ever conventional, Sneha.
Right.
I'll see you.
Poor thing.
So young!
Morning walks without Viju…
just feels weird.
Gosh, I miss him so much.
I know.
It's tough to get by alone.
You know, if you need anything…
anything at all,
let me know.
I'll be there.
Alright?
See you around.
You think they know Sati got abolished in the early 1800s?
Fuck it! Let's get out of here.
Watch your language, Siddhi.
I'm sorry, Mummy.
But given what mood I am in, it could be a lot worse. Come on.
Your rent is due since two months.
I've never had to ask for it before.
Can you please give me a little more time?
How much longer?
One month?
Okay, fine.
Thank you, Uncle.
Sorry.
Alexa! Play Varun's Supersonic Holi Party playlist!
Whatever happens today, let it happen
Don't take it personally
Bhang!
Youth that flows as freely as Bhang
Everyone, take a swig let the colors swirl
My heart beats thud-thud-thud
Your looks are deadly enough To kill-kill-kill
The players are all painting the town red
They spray color on you and talk dirty
The players are all painting the town red
They spray color on you and talk dirty
Pour! Pour! Pour!
She says, pour another shot
She sways here and there downing the shot
It drives her crazy
Don't fall, put your Arms around your lover
No doubt that the butterfly tattoo On your waist makes me swoon
My heart beats thud-thud-thud
Your looks are deadly enough To kill-kill-kill
The players are all painting the town red
They spray color on you and talk dirty
The players are all painting the town red
They spray color on you and talk dirty
Pookie Auntie!
Yes, child!
Where are you going?
I'm just going in.
I also want to come.
This Arya is obsessed with the Khannas.
Who are the Khannas?
Some new TV show?
Cut off TV privileges. My mother used to do it all the time with me.
Girls!
The Khannas?
Varun, Kavya, Aarav?
-Oh shit! -Oh!
She wants to spend all of her time with them.
Why do you think we are here and not at my place?
She threw a mega fucking tantrum!
"I want to play Holi with Aarav!"
"We are a family!"
"Blah blah blah"!
Making fun of your own kid! Love it!
Love it!
Listen, it's not about the family, it's about Aarav.
Yeah, she just likes being a big sister and has a baby to play with!
And she also knows too much hanging out with Varun is injurious to health.
Mangs, Varun just happens to be her father!
I know, poor baby.
Dance! Dance!
So mean!
Everyone makes mistakes, so you are forgiven.
If you want to make babies, Arjun is always there.
Still that kid joke? Really?
We're not calling him a kid, we're calling him to make kids!
Yeah, I told you, you should've spawned his babies.
-Yeah. -So lean, so fit bro!
Such a cutie!
I swear! He must have good swimmers also!
One shot and boom! Congratulations!
Alright, time up!
Will you shut up? Shut up!
-Bring it! Bring it! -Shut up!
Move it move it baby
Move your body baby move it
I know you want me baby
Move it move it baby, move your body
-Uncle, you get a glass! -Thank you, son.
Auntie you definitely need a glass.
Hey!
Come back in five years!
Nice try.
You look so hot right now.
But baby, you should try me in bed.
Worst pickup line ever.
Hey!
My pickup lines got you hook, line and sinker.
But seriously…
you should try me in bed.
Oh, so cute!
So coy!
So lovely!
This calls for a strong glass of "youthzpah"!
I'll take that. Thank you, Varun.
Oh, my God! Sneha Auntie I can't--
Oh my God!
-And that's how it's done. -Oh my God!
Hey, Jeh…
Siddhi's mom is really hot!
Bro, you okay?
Yeah!
Never felt better!
Heya mate!
In a while, crocodile!
Your looks are deadly enough To kill-kill-kill
The players are all painting the town red
They spray color on you and talk dirty
The players are all painting the town red
They spray color on you and talk dirty
Down the hatch girls!
Yes!
Okay…
Her dress is wet
But still looks very innocent
Won't hold back today
It is Holi!
I'm seeing a genuine smile on Sneha's face after so long.
But not everyone's happy about it.
Like who?
Oh these…
pervy uncles who just want to bring joy to her vagina.
And these bitchy aunties who want her vagina to grow mold and fall off.
You should've been there this morning.
All these horny uncles hovering around her.
And these angry, insecure aunties,
with horns on their heads, charging towards her like bulls.
And to think she wasn't even wearing red.
But I saw red everywhere.
Are you just going to do stand-up sitting down or
do you plan on going back to the stage?
Yeah, you must miss it right, Sids?
And you also need it, right? For your own sanity?
It can be therapeutic.
Really?
Can it bring my dad back?
Sorry!
-It's okay. -Sorry…
But seriously how is Sneha?
Beneath it all?
I hear her cry.
Sometimes in the bedroom with locked doors, sometimes in the bathroom…
And you?
Me?
I cry everywhere!
Have you both ever talked about this with each other?
Let this go, man!
Come on. Let's get high!
Where's the Bhang?
Over? I will get it!
The players are all painting the town red
They spray color on you and talk dirty
The players are all painting the town red
They spray color on you and talk dirty
Okay, Arya.
Arya, child.
Come here.
You have to drink water.
Have some more.
Wanna get high?
Okay…
-It's vodka shot o'clock! -No!
-No, come here! -Varun, I'm not doing this!
Holi is the time for all unholy things!
-Var-- -Open your mouth, I'll tickle you!
Okay!
Boom!
Ten years of torture with you was enough for me.
I thought I had finally gotten away!
Never! No one can escape Varun!
Hey, remember that time?
We were in Delhi for Holi?
Bhatia's party! At that gigantic Chhatarpur farm.
We couldn't find the place! We kept going round in circles!
It might have been better if we didn't find it.
You were trashed, you went to sleep!
In the bushes!
And then Bhatia Uncle sent the cops
to try and find me!
And remember that time in Hampi?
Don't remind me of that.
I was hallucinating for two fucking days!
Remember that time? You in the water tank?
And I was trying to pull you out of it?
I was like, "Anj, trust me!"
-Okay, Varun, stop. -Come on.
Stop doing this.
Doing what?
Stop being nostalgic! It led us to fooling around once…
I don't want to, you know, just get into it again. Just--
-Vodka shots! -Yeah!
-God, I love them! -Yes!
Too bad I'm still feeding Aarav.
I guess next year?
Anyway what were you guys discussing so animatedly?
-Nothing! -Nothing!
Nothing!
Anj…
What were you and Varun giggling about earlier?
Oh, that.
I think just remembering the old stuff.
We made a mistake by kissing once already.
I…
I don't know what he wants.
Sex closure.
Sex plus closure.
-Sex closure. -Not in a million years.
I've decided that life was less complicated when I wasn't doing it.
But someone should get some, 'cause I ain't getting any.
Neither am I!
What about Jeh and Dee?!
Resident bunnies.
They'll do it on everyone's behalf.
Why are you flushed?
-It's the Gulaal. -Liar.
Jeh and I…
we haven't been…
I…
haven't been able to do it…
since the miscarriage.
I hope he's not pressuring you. I'll whoop his ass.
No, he's actually very patient and understanding.
I mean, not that he doesn't try once in a while, but,
you know, no pressure.
I don't know what's wrong.
You know, every time we get going…
I get these flashes, okay, of…
of the pregnancy, of…
the confusion, of the…
You know, that hospital smell, that…
And I just go cold.
It'll take time, Dee.
But it's been so long already, right?
Has it?
Papa died the same day.
Am I over it?
And you'll hurt, Sids.
Both you and Dee.
And with time, it's not going to be more or less,
it's just gonna be different.
Dee, can I say something?
I just feel that, after going through all that trauma you and Jeh…
jumped too quickly into this whole thing.
Really?
Yeah.
She might have a point.
I am drowning in you, my love
The river of my heart has broken free
I am drowning in you, my love
The river of my heart has broken free
I am drowning in you, my love
My love…
Hey, what's wrong?
Jeh…
I mean…
I…
Oh gosh, I love your smell.
"Perspire by Jeh."
I should bottle and sell it.
"Home by Jeh."
You're my softest pillow.
My cocoon.
My safe spot.
You mean nuclear bunker?
I mean it.
Are you drunk or sentimental?
Or sentimental because you're drunk?
Maybe both?
Why so sad?
I'm broke.
We're all broke, dude!
Broke like ceramic vases.
But then, we get glued back together.
Like…
Like kintsuki.
Imperfectly beautiful.
Wow. That was deep.
Broke.
Not broken.
I don't have the money to pay rent.
I'll be homeless by the end of the month.
Listen,
move in with me!
Then we'll be like sisters forever.
#SadSisters.
No bank will give me a loan.
There are loans to pay rent now?
For my studio.
What studio?
It doesn't exist yet.
But it will.
Umami Fitness.
Umami.
A little sweet, a little sour, a little bitter.
All Umang.
-All me. -Wow, man!
That is such a cool name!
Umami.
Do you know any investors?
I do.
And she's awesome.
Me!
Papa's left me shit loads of money!
Just take some.
That's not what I meant, Sids. I can't take your money.
Listen, you won't be just taking it.
It's gonna be an investment.
Plus, what's the point of my privileged existence?
If I can't help my BFF?
No.
Anyway, Mangs, one day we will all die, dude.
It's pointless.
Just take it, take it all.
You know…
you can call it something else also.
Wasabi Fitness.
Ask why?
Why.
Because you make people cry with pain in your classes.
Jeh.
Yes?
We should…
we should move in together.
Drunk Damini had better not take drunk decisions.
Now open your mouth.
We make all these plans in life…
and then suddenly,
one day we realize that there's no fucking meaning to anything!
Chill out man, everything will be okay.
You could be walking on the street,
and get hit by a bus.
And then suddenly, boom!
That's it! Over!
Okay, papa time joke.
I mean, papa joke time!
What do you call Batman if he got hit by a bus?
What?
Flatman!
Sids, you're clearly not okay.
Dude, I'm fucking awesome!
I understand everything now.
I know the eternal truth of life.
Put me down?
Further, further.
Listen.
-Listen to me carefully, okay? -Okay.
Life is shit,
and shit always falls apart.
Okay.
Not if you have enough fiber, but…
What?!
Dude, where is Anj and Dee man?
They're probably dead too.
Just my luck!
Arya, take a bite, quickly. Come.
Chew, chew…
I love curry-rice even more than pancakes!
God, finally.
Arya.
You doing okay, Anj?
Yeah.
It's…
just really nice to see her with her baby brother.
I know.
She makes such a good big sister.
You know Varun will always be Arya's dad first.
Arya, come! Curry-rice!
Oh, baby!
Mama I got a boo-boo!
Oh my God!
Let me kiss your boo-boo and it's gonna be okay!
Pookie Auntie, you also kiss my boo-boo.
-Okay, get up. Come. -Dada will also kiss your boo-boo.
-Yeah! -And one kissy-kissy for my…
-baby mama. -Okay.
Do kissy-kissy with mama also.
Molu?
No…
-Of course! -Var-
No, not like that. Like you did with Pookie Auntie.
Molu?
Mama and Dada are divorced.
I explained it to you.
We can't do that, okay?
You can, I saw you doing kissy-kissy on the lips.
Arya stop making up things, okay?
You're watching too much TV with Radha!
All nonsense! Let's go!
No TV, in the kitchen I saw you doing kissy-kissy on the lips.
Sneha!
I love you, Mummy!
I love you!
What?
When you were younger, right?
When you were a small girl?
No, when Dada was sleeping on the sofa.
That…
that night when you were too drunk to come home?
When I was six months pregnant, and
you were out partying with your ex-wife and her friends, that night?
Thanks, Anj.
Thanks a lot.
Kavya, there's…
nothing going on between us.
Did you and Varun kiss or not?
Did you?
-Did you? -Yes.
Get out.
-Kavs… -No, get the hell out.
-Baby, it's a bit of an overreaction. -I'm overreacting?
I knew that something had happened but,
I kept telling myself that Varun can't do this to me and more than that,
Anj can't do this to me!
Kavya.
But I was wrong, I was so goddamn wrong.
Sids…
Stop it.
-Do kissy with me, Mangs! -Open the door!
This okay?
There you go.
I'm very worried about Siddhi.
After Viju died…
Siddhi isn't herself anymore.
You aren't yourself either.
We can all see that.
We're both drowning, my child.
We're just clinging on to each other in the attempt to stay afloat.
But we're both drowning.
Have you spoken to her?
Don't protect each other from the pain.
Talk.
I can't do that.
I'll end up needing her to take care of me.
I can't do that to Siddhi.
We should've told Kavya that very day.
Varun we agreed not to, because she was pregnant and it would hurt her.
Yeah, but now it's worse.
So it's my fault?
No.
As usual, it's my fault.
Dee.
Good night.
Move in with me?
It's safe here.
Jeh, wait.
This is the only key I have on me.
The spare is inside.
Does that mean you need me to come upstairs and open the door for you?
Yes.
And then?
And then you stay.
I want you when it's blurry
When I can't see too clearly
Don't sober me up with coffee
'Cause I want you when it's blurry
Oh…
Everything makes sense in the night
Everything makes sense in your eyes
Hold me in your arms, take me high
Promise that I won't say good night
Come on spin me round Take me down to the morning
Counting shaky stars And fast cars
Oh I'm falling down
I'm falling down
'Cause I want you when it's blurry
When I can't see too clearly
Don't sober me up with coffee
'Cause I want you when it's blurry
Oh…
I want you when it's blurry