Littu!
Yes.
Come.
Aunty!
Hey!
Give me your blessings, aunty. How are you?
- I'm fine. - Here's your stuff.
Why did you deliver it yourself? I was about to send Littu.
I won't go anywhere.
What are you saying, Aunty?
I was passing by besides it was your stuff
so I thought of dropping in.
So sweet. Thank you, John.
Lakshay...
please keep the groceries in the fridge.
Did you get Ramveer to drop off Beeba's bag?
Please immerse yourself in your silly phone and ignore your mom.
- OG Kochhar. - Yes.
Try those tricks on your first born.
Lakshay!
John.
- Hi, bro. - Hey John!
- Lakshay! - You have grown tall.
Thank you. Do you mean it?
I meant long time.
- I see. - How long it has been since we met!
Okay.
I have some more deliveries to finish.
- Of course. - I'll get going and catch you later.
Yeah, grocery man.
Thank you, bro.
Aunty, see you later. Take care.
- Thanks. - Bye, bro
- Such a down to earth guy. - Lakshay!
You're an idiot! Stop joking about his height.
But, it did make you laugh, right?
Stop it.
Please keep this in the fridge.
- Hello. - I've some place to go.
- Where to? - There.
- The food's here. - There's food there too.
- Come. - The food's here.
There's something for you.
- Okay. - Look, you were busy with work last week.
So our session never happened.
I thought of completing it tonight.
Please come.
So sweet!
- Thank you. - Will you WWF with me?
C'mon!
No that's yours this is mine.
Here we are.
How we reached this far
and how all this happened?
In retrospect, I have no idea
- how, where and when... - right on time.
- Food is served? - It just happened.
We just clicked.
You're all idiots.
- Sorry? - You know
- you're all late. - It was fun.
It takes 4-5 hours to get dressed. Right?
Hello, don't taunt me.
I couldn't decide what to wear.
I tried pink, maroon, magenta, etc.
Then I thought of mixing it up.
A bit of pink and a bit of blue.
It wasn't blue skies and rainbows.
We had a lot of rough patches, we had fights.
We were jealous because we were
Stupid grocery guy! Why is he sitting there?
He's sitting next to OG Kochhar as if it's his sister's wedding.
- Shouldn't... - I recall Amrita leaving for America.
We'd been dating for some months and
we really liked each other.
And I didn't know what to say or how to feel
but this woman...
She sat me down and she said
- what I really want is... - Sex?
I have heard weddings are the OG hookup place!
We'll get the guy to complete double century on this pitch.
What say?
Don't ruin things for me.
Definitely! This is your playground.
I'm sure you're going to get so much...
Action. It was time to take action.
So, I popped the question.
And she said yes.
I've never looked back ever since.
In a country where
it's difficult to find love,
we found each other.
Cheers to that.
Cheers.
And now I would like my other half
to come here and say a few words.
- Of course. - Please.
I love you too.
I forgive you because you're too cute.
"The girls' tresses"
"are dark like clouds"
"The girl's pretty as spring time"
"The girl's smile is like a river"
"People will keep talking"
Friends!
Take it easy.
My family's the most progressive in Ghana.
Listen, is Amrita's family progressive too?
Why get into family politics? Just drink up like him.
I don't drink. I am sorry.
So old-timers, all good?
- Yes. - Great going.
Going on well right...
- It hasn't even started entirely yet - What's this?
Chicken lollipop.
Listen pimp,
don't drink till you throw up.
Understood?
- Why are you yelling? - Then drink responsibly.
Look who's talking!
- Responsibility! - Responsibility!
I know I drink irresponsibly.
But I don't puke, okay?
No alcohol in the world
can make Lakshay Kochhar puke.
Only one Kochhar pukes and there she is.
OG Kochhar.
- Listen to me. - Tell me.
Let's get my dad and your mom to drink together some day.
They'll bond really well.
You see, my mom is happily single.
Get your dad to sign up with Tinder.
Oh hello! My dad is also happily married.
Okay not happily but married!
His mother too...
- Littu! - She likes girls.
- Yes? - Come
It's my turn!
My Beeba and baby.
Awesome.
Hear me.
No no, start with the feet.
Okay.
Have this bro
Beeba, you look so hot!
Be like that on the wedding day too.
I'll leave, I've got things to do.
John, Can you check on the food?
I saw it 5 minutes ago.
Don't worry, leave it to me.
- 10 minutes. - Thank you.
Listen son...
Okay, handle that. We'll talk later.
- Aunty. - Yes.
I'll keep that.
Keep this in the living room.
- We need it for the wedding. - Okay.
Be careful.
OG Kochhar.
- Listen. - What?
Let's go drink some.
Not now, Littu. Where are your friends?
They'll manage. It's Beeba's wedding.
Let's go drink. We haven't spent time together since I came.
- Come. - Yes, aunty. You were saying?
Where's the 'jalebis'? I've been checking on it 'for' 2hrs now.
Aunty, that guy was making straight 'jalebis'.
I'll have to supervise so he'll make it crooked.
Hence, the delay.
- I'm an expert at crooked things. - But
the 'jalebi' will be ready.
You better meet the caterers right away or...
- I... - Fine, I'll be back in 5-10 mins.
I'll handle it?
Don't. John will handle it.
I can handle it.
Don't worry. Chill with your friends.
Go. I'll be back.
C'mon, get a shower.
- Wrap this up, c'mon. - Come on.
Wait for me.
Bloody grocery guy! He's forever brown-nosing!
Look how he talks! He's a pain!
Arrangements don't need to be checked upon over and over.
Hello!
What are on you on about the grocery guy?
Abuse him outright!
You're no kid!
I've been calling him that since I was a kid.
OG Kochhar wouldn't know
that I mean it disrespectfully!
What's your problem if he's working hard?
He's been teasing me since childhood.
He used to top in class.
He'd work in the grocery shop.
And OG Kochhar would lecture me.
Littu, look at John.
He's also working in the grocery shop.
He tops in all the exams
and look at you! I too worked in the salon!
OG Kochhar would ask me to get milk.
Before I could get it,
the grocery guy would deliver it at home!
- He's a grocery guy! - Exactly! He's a wretch.
- Must be tough, right? - You've no idea.
To be born in a rich, privileged family.
First world problems are real, bro!
You...
All right, sit.
Sit.
Come.
Why are we here?
To attend the wedding and chill out.
You're not letting either of us chill.
Only Kochhar should handle Kochhar's duties.
Be it may. But let John toil for the day.
You enjoy.
We have to attend many more events and dance away.
Get a massage.
It's my style to toil and chill.
You don't get it.
You've toiled with existence long enough. What more do you want?
- You did, right? - You're a wretch too.
- Hey... - I want to work.
- I'll give you some task. - Do that.
Okay, pick up those flowers.
- Where? - Those ones.
Careful, don't drop them.
Then you'll complain that nobody wants your help.
Gandhi, my boy, just play it cool man!
Just be yourself, do your thing. Go easy there.
I'll be missing you.
Bro!
Be yourself, not too much.
- Be yourself. - What does that mean?
I mean
share your interests and passion.
Ask her about her interests
and passion. Ask all these
questions that are very important.
I'm set.
I'm going. Do your thing.
Interest, passion, ask question. You're a Ghanian 'Lion'...
Hey, not this. Quit this, no!
No.
- Hi. - Hi.
Just looking at you from there. You're pretty.
Flowers...
Excuse me!
I'm Akhil.
- Ira. - Lakshay's friend.
- Lakshay's neighbour. - Oh Neighbour!
- I'll just get my food. - Yes sure.
You see it right through me, don't you?
Anyway, can I help you with something?
The turmeric may be.
The turmeric... Oh turmeric milk!
How regressive!
No, full on progressive.
Nothing to worry.
- Here. - Oh wow, okay. A lot of help.
By the way,
is this 'kurta' working for you or should I like
come up with a cheesy pick up line?
Please don't tell me that actually works.
Usually it does not but
I'm thinking, I hope it works today.
No?
I'm an old school romantic.
Oh yeah, I see how
old school romance and pick up lines go hand in hand.
You just get me, don't you? Oh sarcasm!
Anyway... By the way, Avinash.
Avi.
Falak
- Falal? Cute name. - Thanks.
- So, I play cricket. - Okay.
I mean cricket is my interest
and passion.
You know cricket? Virat Kohli, Rohit?
Sachin master blaster.
Kapil Dev 1983 world cup.
You know, I think I should go find my family actually.
I should have stayed in Ghana.
Wait, did you say Ghana?
Yeah.
Are you an NRI?
That's so exotic!
Is it?
Wedding celebrations are on since yesterday and you still don't have a girl!
Can't help it.
What do you mean? As always, one night stands.
Wait, someone's at the door.
You're' fast
- One minute. - I thought as much.
I have my faith in you.
Wait a minute.
How are you, my bro? All well?
Very good.
Dude, we have a situation and I need your help.
So, there's a girl out there who is just
completely all over me, full power signal and flirty with me.
The problem is that I feel like a 'lech'
I just broke up and I'm hooking up already.
But should I be thinking so much? You tell me.
Usually I'd discuss this with Lakshay
because you know he's a 'lech' as well.
We can vibe on that situation but right now I have you so you tell me
What should I do?
Mahima is also moving on
because she's the one who broke up with me
and now she's moving on. So what is the problem?
There's no problem so I should be moving on.
Should I be moving on? Right.
So, I'm moving on.
Get down.
- Take off your slippers. - Yes.
So, I'm moving on and
thank you. I'll keep you updated.
Great. All set.
Bro, there's a situation.
Why do you keep climbing the bed?
That John is jaundice!
He's offering to do everything for mom!
That minion makes me feel like a tourist
at my sister's wedding in my home!
That's not done.
What are you looking at?
You want me to give advise?
Is this a monologue game?
Look, I think you're being egoistic.
Correct.
I think I'll use my ego and set him right.
Bloody hell, I ought to do something.
Someone has challenged Kochhar's core competency.
I think, given the wedding celebrations,
it's better if you don't do anything.
But I must if I can make the wedding rock, right?
What say?
- Much better. - Yes.
I have to put him down at any cost.
- Definitely. - I mean that won't be very difficult.
- But we'll make that happen. - Yes.
So much for giving self-respect to my ego.
- Kill it. - You're amazing, bro.
- You're so wicked. - Lakshay, I was looking for you.
Get lost.
- Bro, I was looking for you. - What for?
First of all, how to get rid of this turmeric shit?
- It won't go. - Bathe in your room!
Oh no.
What do you want?
C♪♪ks♪♪♪♪r
You're popular these days.
- Fine. - The situation is
- Handle it, I'm just idling away. - Every girl wants to sleep with me
because I'm an NRI.
But you know my upbringing.
Since childhood I'm an Indian from within.
True blue Indian.
I usually consult Lakshay for such things but he's busy.
So I came to you. What do I do?
Good you came to me. I'm like a big brother to you.
Right?
What does she want?
An NRI fling?
Now give her the most ' "NRI" ' she has ever 'NRI-d'
Okay.
She'll get her kink
and you'll get experience.
And I'm sure she's not looking for anything serious.
Sorted. Who looks for a serious connection in a wedding anyway?
- Yes. - Except for the bride and groom!
- Come. - Brides in this case.
Both are bride and groom!
Enough theories, now it's time for practicals.
- Sure. - Bye.
- You're welcome. - NRI ever NRld.
- Best advice. - Get lost.
Thank you.
- Thank you. - You're disgusting.
You got yourself three guys but no girl!
I'm plagued with such fools!
Takes one to know one, right?
- Get lost. - You too.
Don't tell me you didn't enjoy Messing with Lakshay's head.
These little things keep me amused.
Well, I want to tell you something. I had applied for London
I'll know in a couple of weeks
I'll get in or not.
- You were serious about that? - Yeah, of course.
Look at you!
Oh no! Are you taking a screenshot?
- Don't be a fool. - Of course, you're so sad.
Why would I be sad? In fact I'm quite happy.
- It's a great opportunity. - Yeah.
I want to give this moment back.
Had I not known you I would've actually felt you'll miss me.
Like look at your face!
All right ladies and gentlemen,
you have to see my presentation
whether you like it or not.
Then we can resume to 5 different variations of 'kala chashma'.
I've known Beeba all my life.
And I can speak for everybody here
she's no ordinary girl but a storm.
Next.
Cute storm.
Beeba has been my biggest protector
and even bigger bully.
I never really thought that
she'd find someone who truly deserved her
until I met... Next.
Amrita.
You know to be in their presence is to be in the presence of love.
Oh c'mon!
They met 4 years ago
and have been living together since 2 years.
What?
I can't believe you, Lakshay Kochhar!
One day! You couldn't live one day without drama!
He didn't know that Amrita's family doesn't know about the live in.
How would he know?
He'd have to be here for that!
Hold on...
Explain this to me please.
They don't mind them being lesbians.
The don't mind a same sex wedding.
But they mind a live-in! Wow!
At least be legitimately conservative!
It's Amrita. I've to take this.
It's okay.
Control yourself.
Where are you? What are you doing?
It's your sister's wedding.
Take some responsibility...
I'm trying to.
And I'm so glad I pulled that stunt. At least you noticed my presence.
- What? - Go check with John!
So she said you're self absorbed.
Yeah pretty much. That's how we broke up so...
That doesn't seem like a problem to me
That's because all of this you see is an act.
It's part of my big grand plan where I find someone as beautiful as you are
and then I lure her in
and give her all this attention and make her feel special and all that stuff.
Well, I guess it's working.
Is it?
Let's see if your dance moves are as good as your pick-up lines.
Say no more.
Very good. Very good.
Come I'll do the snake dance.
'As the breeze moved, leaves fell to the earth and said'
Wow!
- 'There shall be spring' - Wow.
Wow, Paramveer.
Too good. My turn.
'Glanced at every branch'
Wow.
'But the branch I glanced at'
'was cut off by the gardener'
Wow.
Son, listen to this.
'Since ages'
'Since ages I yearn for you'
'How do I express how I live?'
Wow.
'I count stars in agony'
You're taking forever to decorate the flowers. How much longer will you take?
Hurry up.
Lakshay!
Are you okay?
Bro, you're okay?
Who are you?
- Meaning? - Who are you?
I'm John.
Who are you to Beeba?
Who are you to OG Kochhar and this family?
You're teasing me, right?
No, I really want to know.
Even my own relatives aren't toiling for this wedding
the way you are!
Who are you?
It's said, the ones you spend time with becomes your family.
So Beeba is like a sister to me.
Aunty is like a mother to me.
And you're my brother.
Besides, when you weren't around, She used to seek my help.
I practically grew up here.
Hence, I'm doing this.
Aslam, wait with the flowers.
Bro, now that you're here, the celebration is more fun.
No party is fun without Kochhar!
Right? I'll go now.
- Bye. - Get the flowers.
Don't just carry the basket, decorate the room.
Move in quickly. Come.
Hey
Hi.
Breakfast?
Yeah, sure.
- Breakfast in bed? - Breakfast?
Okay.
Shall we?
You go first.
But we just...
No.
I'll just let myself out.
Smoke!
You've started smoking!
That too at OG's place?
Sometimes.
Have an extra?
Is it? You too?
I am a veteran
So, how are your in-laws?
In-laws!
They're fine. Her parents are miffed.
But we've come so far so we'll handle it.
I'm actually a little relieved you know.
Like, you saved me from an awkward conversation.
I just now need to tell them about the child
we're adopting and then it's done.
Look at your face! I'm kidding.
Beeba, I'll thrash you.
You've been thrashed since you took your first step.
"Gibberish"
Think again, shorty!
She's mad at you
mostly because her daughter's leaving the house.
And you're MIA in this whole process.
What do I do then? Abandon everything and come move back?
Of course not.
Beeba, I messed it all up.
I always do that.
That's what you were born for.
True that.
For the next 5 months
just try to be pleasant.
That's all.
She wants her child to show up.
What will I do showing up?
She chats with that grocery guy more than me.
You're never around to talk!
How many times do you call her in a day?
There are different types of relationships.
Okay and there are ones where
you don't know what you've gotten yourself into.
Then there are ones where you realise
that you don't know what you want.
And then there are ones where
you know the love exists
but you don't know how to figure it out.
Will you come home tomorrow?
I really want to see you.
Or any place you like.
I just want to see you.
That's how it is with you and OG.
None of this is making sense.
I don't know how to get there. I don't know if I can figure it out.
I don't even know if she needs me anymore.
Of course she doesn't need you.
She doesn't need me either.
She got the whole of South Delhi overcome it's homophobia!
She transformed everyone!
That should explain it.
- There's none like OG Kochhar. - Indeed!
But she needs the grocery guy, okay?
She does. You won't do the chores everyday.
I'll do that if she wants.
Please stop with your tall claims.
It's okay. You have your own life.
Just make a little effort.
She just wants you to be a part of her life.
That's all she wants.
And baby Kochhar,
one can't live without grocery.
But her wishes are deep rooted.
And she wants you. She wants you in her life.
That grocery guy
can get the noodles but she'll eat them with you, right?
Please stop competing with the grocery guy!
Take your head out of your ass and enjoy my wedding.
I don't plan to do it again.
Beeba!
Come.
Wasn't that too much affection?
Yeah, I can't take it. I'm feeling suffocated.
Come quick.
I'll miss you!
Bye.
I shouldn't have said that. F♪♪k!
Love you so much.
Send me a fuck off message every morning.
Promise.
Don't cry.
They'll be in the same city.
Noodles, next week?
Hmmm
Get chicken on your way.
I'll make biryani.
From John's father's shop.
Beeba's married!
Wow.
"I have no cares in the world"
"I soar to the skies"
"I regale in happiness galore"
"I forsake the customs of the world"
"We made unique vows"
"Pay heed to nobody"
"Just follow your heart"
"Pay heed to nobody"
"Just follow your heart"
"Pay heed to nobody"
"Just follow your heart"
"Pay heed to nobody"
"Just follow your heart"
"You're in love"
- "You're in love" - Applause.
I don't get this. Did you attend my sister's wedding
or bang-tober festival?
Marriages are the OG hook up places.
Check with Gandhi if you like.
I mean, I don't know, bro.
Yes, it was a great experience but
I think it'd be better if I had feelings for her.
He is right.
Even the girl I was with,
I don't know like having sex without feelings just felt like
just felt like meaningless sex.
I still feel hollow. Don't get me wrong, she was
all nice, beautiful, kind, sweet, everything
but I couldn't look at her in the morning. It was
- weird. - Well,
how does it feel when you do have feelings?
When you have feelings,
there's depth.
Depth.
Have you guys lost it?
And what's with you?
You guys are a shame in the name of youth.
Humans are born warriors.
What's he meant to do?
Eat, sleep, f♪♪k, repeat.
You can never have enough of these.
In that case, the poet's balls must've shrunk!
You missed out on marriage for verses.
Who have you chosen, Mr Poet?
No, it's fate.
Spend time with Sameer and you'll learn.
You...
Go on.
'The tryst that can't see completion'
'is better left with an intriguing twist'
Okay.
So that was a beautiful tryst.
Where did you leave it?
You!
Go answer the door.
Bro!
New found agency.
- I'll answer the door. - Nice.
Buddies, I'm curious.
Who could it be this late?
Hi.
You actually came!
- Yes. - Come.
Oh man! It's Dhriti.
It's Dhriti.
It's her.
I call you often.
But you don't show up.
I know. But...
you just sounded a little different.
I did?
Yeah, you did.
I can't lose you.