- Where did you get us bro? - Honey Paaji's Rehab bro!
Stay cool!
What? What are you doing?
k is this? Are you stupid?
Bro, is this the place?
300% it's the right place.
Dhriti won't stop calling. We'll be screwed if we fail.
Tell her...
We won't return without him.
Bro!
- Bro! - Lakshay Kochhar.
Big fan.
I'm Avinash.
I'm a huge fan.
Sir, I've a small request.
Teeny tiny one. No big deal for you.
Please grace our fest with your presence.
We'll bring you back before the doctor arrives.
We will paaji.
It fits you well paaji.
Paaji, the glasses.
- Very good. - Looking great, sir.
Superb.
I warned you that those idiots can't pull this off.
What do I do with 400 people waiting?
- I... - Don't give me that.
Why didn't you do something?
You know what? Don't show me your fg face.
Just get out and sort this out right now.
At least sort those 400 people.
Do something!
Kochhar Arora.
Say it.
- Kochhar Arora. - Guys...
- Say it. - Stop it.
Kochhar Arora.
- Hi. - Hello.
So, it's decided then?
Friendship over?
Arora will take 17 steps to get better.
Denial, anger, crying, overcompensating...
back to denial...
69 with Lloyd...
wearing the same old underwear...
We're good.
We're roommates again.
Soon we'll be friends again.
It'll work out.
There's another important step though.
Wonder how that will happen.
What?
After last week's drama,
the house just seems lifeless.
You mean...
I sucked the life out of that house.
k man!
Well, I...
I didn't want to
make you feel this way but
yeah it's true in a way.
Ever since you came
you snatched away everything, Mahima.
Sameer's poetry, Gandhi's cricket,
my peace and joy.
Karkardooma case, Khalko's doctor
and RCB's fortune too!
- You're a witch! - I will kill you.
Your feet are inverted.
Save me!
Mister!
She'll kill me.
Sir?
The people here are strange!
I don't approve of this.
They're a disgrace to our country.
- Done? - Yeah.
- Shall we? - Yeah.
Denial suits you very much, cute-oo!
Let's go.
The old guy should've helped.
We'll make a make-out zone here, okay?
You'll be behind, fairy lights,
ambience, beauty, right?
- Yes, ma'am. - Kochhar is here, Frs!
You both, management!
Dhriti, remember?
- Okay, Lakshay - Yes, Captain!
And Avinash, Management.
Did you come here for the make-out zone? Are you Avinash?
Get lost.
Why?
Listen, all awkwardness will be gone.
It's you and Avi.
It'll worsen. His eyes were full of rage.
- Lakshay. - Bro. - Avinash.
Mahima, hi.
Avinash is here!
Of course, I'm here. We're organizing the fest.
So, we have to organize it, right?
Otherwise it'll be like backstabbing in a way.
Right?
- No? - No.
- No? - Yes.
Exactly, I'm not
- really one to do that. - Lakshay, move aside.
Barge in all you want.
Feel free.
Thanks.
I had to.
- Shall we? - Yes.
Hello, manners!
- Say bye to her. What is this? - It's okay.
I used to say bye before leaving my girl.
It's like Manners 101, right?
Actually don't.
Because she left me and she might leave you too.
- Listen, Avi. I know you're hurting. - Avinash!
Avinash, I know you're hurting and I'm sorry.
But I'm not sorry for what happened.
- Okay. - You have to grow up.
- So sorry. - It's okay, it's not on you.
- Just go work. - Okay?
I'm okay, go!
What do people write these days?
"The water is wet. Wet is the water."
I write better for sure.
Sameer, breakfast.
- What's this? - Bread Omelette.
With bread and eggs and salt and pepper.
Please trash it
before you're accused of mass murder and...
I'm accused of my first murder!
g respect for talent in this house.
Idiot, it has egg shells.
That's for crunch. You'll never get it.
Get the door.
- Hey. - Hey, what's up?
How's your...
- What's that smell? - Smell?
k. - Nothing.
Oh, I just farted.
It's great.
- What's up? - Hi.
- What's up. - Hi.
You're here? I mean you can always drop in.
- But all well? Anything special? - Relax.
How will you perform on stage if you fumble so much?
I won't perform!
You know, Javed Gulzar is judging and he loves your poetry?
- You won't perform? - No.
- Yes. - It's decided.
Sorry?
- Look, you're half decent. - Okay.
And amateurs will be performing on the stage.
You'll come across as genuinely talented before them.
Look,
Even if one oaf recites something decent,
The audience won't get it.
But at least Mr. Gulzar will feel our college has
someone cultured.
And who'll be that cultured artist?
Right. I'll do this.
I'll get my name off the list.
Nothing great.
Not an issue.
Well, even I'd like to try something.
What can I do in the fest?
Yes, make him your project.
Art, music, poetry, rocket science.
I don't know rocket science.
I can do poetry though
ON THE STAGE!
Please, give me 2 minutes.
er?
Does he play chess?
Go play with a bat and ball you wimp!
Excuse me.
I'm so sorry. Give me 5 minutes and I'll answer all your questions.
5 minutes please.
What are you doing? Just try poetry.
Don't do this!
It's becoming too toxic. Don't do it.
Wait a second. Toxic?
, okay?
Look,
I know that your father was an ae
for comparing a 16-yr-old's writing with Ghalib.
Thanks, I know about my problems, Dhriti.
You don't have to tell me about my problems.
A. It's a fest.
Thousands will attend
k this crap. I'm not going there.
B. Javed Gulzar has already read my poetry.
So, I needn't perform for him again.
C. I will perform, when I want to perform.
Okay? What I want you to do is
k up, please.
What? What's so funny?
- You. - Me? - You're damn funny.
- I'm funny? - Yeah.
- How? - I cannot unfk up
d up. - Cool!
k a fk up.
Don't do it. I don't fg need you.
- You don't need me? - No.
- You sure? - Yes.
- Lock it? - Yes.
Wrong answer.
Dhriti.
Within half hour you'll come crying to me...
- Dhriti! - I won't. - You always do.
You can do nothing without me.
- Please leave. - Yell all you want
- but you're still a coward. - Fine, I am.
- I'll handle him. - Wasted time...
Why did you come to waste your time?
Respect me. I'm here for you.
But you won't get it.
. - It's okay.
I'll handle him.
How will a child handle him?
for the second time.
Never again!
Dhriti!
k me!
Gandhi, don't irritate...
Sorry, tell me.
If we go to college now,
I'll get selected in some club, right?
Yeah maybe.
Pick that up.
Move ahead.
- Why? - Move ahead.
- Why? - Let's go to college.
Excuse me, what is the word you say?
Please, move ahead.
Kids these days!
Hurry.
Do you think I'm a coward?
And Dhriti thinks I can't perform!
Right away.
Verse of the day, Peace.
Once it shall happen.
Once...
One second.
You're done?
Please let's get this done.
We need to find a vocalist at the earliest.
You were looking for a good vocalist?
I have great vocals.
I'm Gandhi from Ghana.
- BJMC... - Go on.
- Let's hear you. - First year, sports quota.
- Come. - Yeah, sure.
Gandhi, you can do it.
Just give me one second to prepare.
Sure!
And Dhoni finishes off in style with a helicopter shot.
Magnificent strike into the crowd
and India wins by 7 wickets.
Gandhi, what are you doing?
Vocals?
Thank you.
Let's start.
The first verse, Peace.
Once it shall happen
the heart will...
To hell with the heart!
Hey! What is this?
Wait.
You need to pay for that.
- Understand the intent. - What's that?
People will enjoy, okay?
They'll get drunk and pass out.
Okay, sir.
Since you've thought it out, tell us about the parking.
The plan is that there is no plan.
We've been taught since childhood to barge in wherever you can.
Agreed?
Clap for Lakshay Kochhar. He's so smart.
Because according to him only 30 cars will be here.
Okay? The others will go to Kirorimal.
We don't want that. We've got to get people to our fest.
What we'll do is apply the grid system.
Do you understand the grid system?
That's East Delhi
and this West Delhi.
That's North Delhi and
- that's South Delhi. - NCR?
NCR is better off with Kirorimal.
By the way, I need 4 people here
because people from East Delhi park their cycles here
and block the path...
We have to sort the admin canteen.
Let's go. Let's go. Let's go.
Final touches.
- Wow. This... - Hi.
This is such a beautiful, vivid, critique in toxic masculinity.
This is the World cup.
Oh. Okay.
Lakshay, I'm taking the lead.
Okay. If someone complains about unsalted food.
Will I start stocking sacks of salt?
The canteen has been serving this food for 10 years and will do so.
Understood? Get lost.
- How are you, Lamba? - Fine.
I was saying...
First pay up the pending tab.
Lamba, I'll pay you later. Listen to me.
There's a fest coming up.
If the food could be improved...
Improved? Meaning?
He means how about some spaghetti instead of Chow-Mein
- Lakshay... - Forget him and talk to me...
If the food gets better, I won't have to put up food stalls.
Or we'll have to put up the stalls ourselves.
Do that. What are you waiting for?
You don't understand.
- If... - Mr.Lamba,
Yes.
Guess you don't understand him so I'll be clear.
The mulch you pass off as food
is absolute trash and our college canteen
will barely break even with no profits.
The next day you will lament.
So what do you choose? Change in menu
or should we outsource the stalls?
Yes, we'll do that.
- I'll do something. - Lovely.
Shall we?
- Sure. - Okay, bro.
Thank you.
- What happened? - The boys are right.
We have to change the menu.
How did they learn of the mulch?
- Tell me. - Loser.
I'm a loser?
Have you gone mad?
Look at this poetry.
His love is salty.
And he can't have enough of it.
They're talking about a blowjob.
In that case use "Blowjob" in the title.
Should I be writing this?
I can't.
What?
Shove it...
No Dhriti time for you from now on.
What did you do?
- What? - Mr.Pandey...
You threatened him, idiot.
That's Pandey. Just chill.
Lakshay, I told you not to interfere.
Let me take a lead on this. What the fk was that?
- Avi, man! - Avinash.
Avinash, my bro...
Only Avinash...
this is what we do every year.
We get things done by hook or by crook.
Who cares how?
Getting things done is all that matters.
Lakshay Kocchar, your way of getting things done
is exactly how you fd up your best friend.
g stupid.
And you don't care.
So no point in telling you anything.
Why do you always turn into a cheap drama queen?
Drama queen? Me?
You calling me that? You wear cheap stuff.
Fine, but you're a drama queen!
Just shut up okay?
g...
What's the problem? You sorted parking
and I sorted the kitchen.
- Is that how you sorted it? - Yes.
- That's how you sorted it? - I did.
g mad! - I just sorted it.
g stop screaming! - Okay.
Bloody animal!
Avi... Avinash... You're not taking the lead
But the load.
Bloody idiot.
Shut up!
Dhriti will screw us, you idiot!
She came in like a train.
And the tracks to my heart warmed up.
Hold on.
I thought she was a spin
d up my wicket like a fast ball.
- Wow! - Get out.
Try for the drama club elsewhere. Go.
Where was I?
- Avinash Arora. - Yes, sir.
What have you done now?
No, sir. Nothing.
I wanted to discuss the timings for the fest.
- Are you on the organization committee? - Yes, sir.
All of us. Yes.
Tell me.
Sir, I feel
The fest is usually from 10AM to 8PM.
So what happens is that
our kids can't enjoy our fest.
It would be great if we could get a time extension.
Not possible. Dean's orders.
If you give the permission, everything's possible.
Please try to understand. After our fest,
Everyone goes to Hindu or Stephen's fest.
That earns us a bad repute.
Sir, please if you could...
Great.
You'll have lesser people to manage.
Remember last year's fest?
Some threw a slipper
- at Hoho. - Sir, Yoyo.
Shastri has a drinking problem.
g sing louder.
You...
I assure you, sir,
there will be no problem, no drunken fights.
- Arora promise, sir. - Arora.
Let things be.
Sir, please give it a thought.
Think what?
Change!
Sir, think about change.
Yes, change is how we evolve. Please, sir.
You can do it.
You're sitting in a position of power.
Sir, usher in a new era. You can do it.
You, me together say yes.
- Let's do this. - Arora, you dumbfk!
Do what you will
you can't control the whole crowd of Delhi.
What hasn't happened once won't happen ever.
What did you say about the fest's timings?
Sir, 8PM...
If we could extend it to 9PM.
Let's make it 7.
- Sir, please don't do that. - Out.
Get lost.
Thank you so much, sir.
It's lovely meeting you. Thank you so much for your time.
Come along.
Keep the chart...
Making out again?
At least do it secretly.
k! Everybody has a right in this country
to live peacefully.
One second.
I'm not feeling it. Just give me a second.
Peace...
Nobody in this country has the right
to live peacefully.
Can I please take it in English?
Why?
Speaking in English will turn you thespian?
Very funny.
Actually, my English is way better so I just wanted to...
Next.
Bharat is back again? Get lost.
Nobody in this country has the right...
One step to your right.
In the spotlight.
- Listen. - Sorry...
Listen.
- Hi, ma'am. - Shivani.
Akhil.
Which department?
BJMC first year sports quota.
A sportsman!
Then have fun like the other guys.
Ogle at girls and fool around. Why are you here?
What am I doing?
I mean whatever I do I give my 100%
- I'm into drama... - 100%?
- Yes. - But why here?
Self-discovery and crap?
More Like...
trying a new perspective and crap.
Do that in sports then.
Will you carry the lights?
Lights? Sure.
Okay, good.
She got 500 grand worth of sponsorship.
Learn from her, idiots.
Tell us what you said.
What?
- Tell them. - Shut up. Guys, listen to her.
- Seek inspiration. - Start.
I just went and I was like
Sir, jewelry is not something you wear around your neck.
It's your pride. It's about respect and culture.
And that's what our fest is for us.
Bravo.
- This is how you need to do it. - And you, sir?
Got the permission?
s!
Clap loudly, now.
Congrats, Mr Kocchar and Mahima.
- The star couple of the college, guys. - C'mon!
- You too toiled a lot. - No.
Don't drag me in your mess. This is you.
- All you. - One second, mess?
He's joking.
Tell her, bro. She needs to know.
- Listen. - Say something. No. No.
Hey. Hey.
- Shy? He's shy. - Guys, enough of this crap.
Just tell me what the fk is going on.
Tell her. I'll save you the trouble, I'll tell you.
How do I put it nicely?
Mr.Kochhar here bribed the admin.
So that's that. He bribed the bloody admin.
What?
Dhriti, it's okay.
Relax. The oldie wouldn't relent.
Firstly, I didn't bribe him.
There was some problem with his flat.
I got that sorted out.
If the Dean learns of this,
He'll screw us all.
Who will tell him?
Lakshay!
Solve your personal differences in private.
Why make a scene in public?
It's not done. Look at me.
It's not done.
Hi.
Are you okay?
Want the truth?
Of course!
I'm not fine.
Listen! I know you think everything is fed right now!
But please don't blame yourself!
Such is the situation.
It's nobody's fault.
Mahima, try to see his perspective too!
I did what I felt was right.
But he thinks I betrayed him.
Even if it's wrong,
it's his perspective!
We haven't been on the same page many a times before.
Once we were not even in the same city.
Sent him on a train to Bhopal, drunk.
I remember that.
He was always the bridge between us.
Exactly. You are Lakshay and Avi.
Not anymore.
The bridge broke because of me.
Life was all good.
I ruined the balance.
Lakshay,
You'd said, no matter what happens
it won't affect us.
I believed it then.
You don't anymore?
Shit happens! But no one tells you how much it's gonna hurt.
k!
- Do you want anything? - No.
Please continue.
No, you were singing.
- Just like that. - You sing well.
- You have a nice voice. - I used to sing in school.
- Then? - I quit.
- Why? - Singing doesn't pay your bills.
Don't you feel like singing before an audience?
To perform and earn accolades?
Shower praises.
I did as a child. Not anymore!
I just hum now and someone like you notices.
That keeps me happy.
Also, you can call me Raniji.